Seeing red...

Hitler: I said I’m not going.

Shadowy Figure: But Sir, it is in your honour.

Hitler: I don’t care. I can’t leave the house. Have you seen the size of this pimple? It’s bigger than the last country I occupied. No, I won’t go.

Shadowy Figure: But who will judge the Sauerkraut competition?

Hitler: Don’t know.

Shadowy Figure: What about all that Wiener Schnitzel? It won’t just eat itself you know.

Hitler: Don’t care.

Shadowy Figure: Did I mention David Hasselhoff is going to be there?

Hitler: AARRRG! No you did NOT mention that. What to do! WHAT TO DO!

Shadowy Figure: What if you pulled your hat down a bit further Fuhrer?

Hitler: Do you THINK I hadn’t THOUGHT of that? It WON’T GO any further you moron!

Shadowy Figure: Um, I guess too late to grow sideburns to hide it. Hmm… balaclava?

Hitler: MORON! And hide my moustache? Who are you, you MORON!

Shadowy Figure: And…if we cut a little hole for the moustache?

Hitler: Little? LITTLE???

Shadowy Figure: Big and impressive! What if we cut a big and impressive hole for your big and impressive moustache?

Hitler: I guess it could be done. Right. We’re in business. Get me a balaclava. And hurry. I heard Hasselhoff leaves at 2:00 sharp. I’ll kill you if we miss him.